BEHIND THE GLOBALL

1. The Patriot

Kris Erickson: I always liked the Patriot, I thought he was great in All-Japan and Global. I wish he could’ve had a singles run as US Champ in WCW, instead of being stuck in that tag team with Bagwell. They had good matches with the Nasty Boys, but whatever. I thought he was awesome in the fed, briefly feuding with Bret Hart and briefly teaming with Vader. Also, I used him steadily in Fire Pro. UNCLE SLAM MOTHER FUCKER!

Brian Krasman: Last pro-USA babyface there ever will be, now that America is a heel and all. As it should be.

Noah Panico: Tom Brandy is ok but this is the original Patriot Del Wilkes. I liked Del Wilkes when he was the trooper so one would speculate I will like him as the Patriot. I guess time and my DVR will tell.

Sam Panico: One of my favorite wrestlers ever. I loved that he was a pure babyface and loved his Uncle Slam finisher. He also had an awesome Jakks figure.

Chris Wood: One of the many ways Tom Brandi can work 3 times on one show.

Jason Kernats:Krac told some girl to ask Tom Brandi (under the hood) at an indy show if his name was Del Wilkes. He said yes.

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was drunk.

2. Joe Pedecino

Kris Erickson: He knows. I think Joe should’ve been a bigger deal in the world of wrestling, but for whatever reason he never took off. Pro Wrestling This Week, with him and Gordon Solie was one of the best shows in the history of the “sport”.

Brian Krasman: ow the fuck did he marry Boni Blackstone, who was 80s-wrestling-woman-hot, not applicable to today’s standards? How the fuck?

Noah Panico:  Joe Pedecino was one of the original fat smart marks. I don’t remember his commentary but we will see if he has any gems in terms of samples soon.

Sam Panico:  Noah, Kris and Deek used to call him week after week. There are mini disks of this, somewhere.

Chris Wood: Good thing he was the promoter because he had no reason to be on anyone’s tv with the way he looked.

Jason Kernats: He Knows

>Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was probably too stoned.

3. Boni Blackstone

Kris Erickson: She was Joe’s wife, she seemed really nice, wasn’t bad looking, but man did she suck on mic/camera. Just horrible. Whatever “It” is, she never had it.

Brian Krasman: I remember Lex Luger going batshit crazy screaming at her on Superstars on her first ever appearance. How the fuck did Pedecino marry her? Not that she’s some catch or anyhting, but he’s this blob of a slob and marries this shapely blonde? Eh, fucking wrestling.

Noah Panico:  Boni was his wife. I remember the name but I don’t remember what she looked like exactly but my sites aren’t set too high. She was married to Pedecino so that right there is an indication that she might like cheese.

Sam Panico:  What the 80s called fuckable.

Jason Kernats: Joe Pedicino also knew this

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was taking a shit.

4. The Handsome Stranger

Kris Erickson: I never cared for him, thought he sucked and only got worse as his career went on.

Brian Krasman: TOTALLY not gay

Noah Panico:  Buff was the stuff and will always be. I liked him as the handsome stranger the first time I watched global so I am expecting the same this time around.

Sam Panico: Jake took him to the ER once. He was from Spaysberry High School.

Chris Wood: Later in life, he would rely on his mom to get over.

Jason Kernats: My dad hates him

Scotty Metropolis:  I don’t know, I was on acid.

5. The Boss

Kris Erickson:  M&M’s/Mars killed the gimmick.

Brian Krasman: I don’t even fucking remember this guy. I do remember Rude Dog.

Noah Panico:  I don’t remember him. Unless we are talking about the bull dyke rapper from the 90s as well.

Sam Panico:  He was Max Andrews. I don’t get pussy.

Jason Kernats: The Guardian Angel

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was sleeping.

6. Rip Rogers

Kris Erickson: One of the best jobbers back in the day, and in feds like Global where he actually got a push, he proved that he was worth something. A good hand.

Brian Krasman: One of wrestling’s many Rips

Noah Panico:  HUSTLER. He never came out to the ICE-T song. And Bolan told me a story from Rip. He said be buff, be toned and tanned. None of these 3 things apply to Rip.

Sam Panico: I’d like to see Rip Rogers kick Lonnie Friend’s ass.

Chris Wood: he was a hustler…

Jason Kernats: looked like a poorman’s Steve Keirn

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was on heroin.

7. Stan Lane

Kris Erickson: Savate kicks. Hair Plugs. Good announcing voice. The weakest part of any tag team he was in.

Brian Krasman: I’ve always been convinced he has an artificial face

Noah Panico: I remember when he was bald with wrestling head gear on. I hope that happens and I also hope he doesn’t announce because he is horrible at that.

Sam Panico: The Fab who wasn’t Skinner and the Express member with a working heart and the Heavenly Body who didn’t rape a girl with Tatanka.

Chris Wood: no matter what, he will only be remembered as 1/2 of two teams, the Fabulous Ones and the Midnight Express

Jason Kernats: savate kick

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I was masturbating.

8. Lightning Kid

Kris Erickson: I was a fan initially, grew to hate him in WCW, even more when he went back to the fed, but later on when he showed up in AAA teaming with Juvi I kinda of dug him again.

Brian Krasman: Well, he sure made the right friends

Noah Panico: This is where he got his start. I remember being excited to see him because he was god. I hope it stays that way the 2nd time around.

Sam Panico: Not dead yet. Might be gay. Almost in jail. Needs to find God. Not all that funny.

Chris Wood: pain in the ass

Jason Kernats: had sex with a woman who had a penis

Scotty Metropolis: I don’t know, I don’t remember what I was thinking.

BONUS GLOBAL PHOTOS!

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One thought on “BEHIND THE GLOBALL

  1. I only sent my answers to Brian, because i am awesome like that:

    1) Proof that a generic gimmick can still work. Figure out a basic theme and run with it.
    2 &3) I think of them together because of the radio show that we listened to and then, because we are us, called in to prank.
    4) One half of R.D. Evans best gimmick.
    5) No idea
    6) I have heard the name. Because i am immature, in my head his name is a fart joke.
    7) Replaced Loverboy Dennis (like anyone could replace Loverboy Dennis)
    8) Ripped his ass in half (multiple times) doing his “X-Factor” face-buster. Gotta admit, I would have probably removed the maneuver from my repertoire after the first time. So kudos to him for his tenacity? I guess?

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