TNA Impact: Aces & Eights restart

This show is in Chicago. #beefthursdays

Kris is not there.

TNA. Where Aces & Eights can fuck over everyone and they still have Taz out there doing commentary.

Mexican’ts vs. Rooooo/Aries, oh wait, Aces & Eights take out the Nise Mexicans and that’s the start. Not one face comes out to help. It’s like the NWO Black and White never went away.

Bully Ray comes out to the shitty Aces & Eights music, which now has shitty lyrics. They have power now, because they have the belt. Do they make more money? Do they get more privileges now? No, of course we don’t know any of that.

TO THE BACK. Sting is mad.

Mickie James/Velvet Sky vs. Gail Kim/Tara: ECW Tiffany is on probation. Tara is over like a babyface because she is from Chicago. So, you know. Send her out as a heel. Velvet wins with some help from ECW Tiffany and this feud continues and hey, Brooke Hogan has a breakdown later tonight.

TO THE BACK. Sad Hulk.

Robbie E vs. Robbie T ends with T winning and dancing. All is as it should be, except neither of these guys is as over without the other.

TO THE BACK. Sting. Hogan.

TO THE CLUBHOUSE. They pick someone to attack.

TO THE BACK. Sting and Hulk need to talk. Hulk only have one breath left in his body. It’s all Sting’s fault. Oh man. THIS IS THE END OF THE MOVIE. THE MOVIE’S OVER BROTHER. Hulk’s eyes look as red as mine right now.

TO THE BACK. STing. Aries. Roo.

From the Observer:

There has been a lot of locker room unhappiness when word got out that for the TV tapings, they would be paid as if it was one show, even if they appeared on both shows taped. Most wrestlers in the company are on per-show deals, and since they rotate people at house shows and run limited crews, the only shows that the full crew, or at least the main crew, is consistently on would be the TV’s. Before they were mostly taping one show at a time in Orlando, whether live or on tape. Now, they are taping two shows starting this week in Chicago, but the vast majority will be getting paid for one show and thus make half as much over the course of a year for television shots.

Isn’t Dixie a great and understand boss?

AJ’s music plays, he doesn’t come out.

But fuck yeah, this happened.

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This was all pretty amazing until James Storm came out and was like, “Creek swimming. Beer drinking. And all that other stuff in my entrance music.”

Storm beats Daniels, which is good when the heat is supposed to be on AJ vs. Daniels. Bad Intentions go two on one on Storm until AJ comes down the ramp. He punches Kaz and then Daniels runs from him. He then takes out Storm, too.

Wes Brisco vs. Kurt Angle highlights are replayed. And, of course, Aces & Eights jumped him in a hallway.

Joseph Park is in his hometown tonight. Well, not really. But you know. Play along. Reps of Park, Park and Park are here. This was a ridiculous babyface promo, which made it all that much better. So, of course, Matt Morgan comes out and ruins it. I would love if Matt Morgan did a clean job to Joe Park and was never seen again, but we all know how this is going to go. Matt Morgan also says, “You got it twisted, son.” Matt Morgan. Black guy.

They show Brooke Hogan freaking out about Bully and holy shit, this made Bully Ray into a babyface. Fuck Hogan. Fuck Brooke Hogan. A rich girl gets screwed over? I’m rich racist, people. “Where’s my dad? I don’t want to be here any more,” screams Brooke. 24 years old, everyone.

UGH.

Austin Aries vs. Sting: Sting gave Aries a bunch here and man, this was a good match. If Sting meant anything any more, this match would have made Aries. Except at the finish, because you know it was Aces & Eights doing another run-in. Up until then? Real good.

Hogan comes out and empowers everyone in the TNA locker room to fight Aces & Eights. “This is exactly what we need.” Um. Dude. Isn’t this what was supposed to happen right from the beginning? Haven’t we done one of these ring clearing brawls before? The best part? We go off the air with Aces & Eights on top anyways. The best part was Kurt telling Garrett Bischoff to hit him right on camera. Great, huh? The entire company just did a job. Seriously, every single contender to the title is doing a job dead center of the ring.

I’m all about putting the heat on the heels, but this was a bit…well, whatever. Nothing really changes in the long run.
Sam

2 thoughts on “TNA Impact: Aces & Eights restart

  1. Dale Oliver, who wrote all of TNA’s music, wrote the Aces & Eights theme. It sounds like Dixie’s husband, Serge, is singing on it. Maybe this A&8 thing really does go deeper than anyone thought?

  2. TNA had the best heel in the business in Bully Ray, then they turned him face, then they turned him heel, but he is now with a generic group of bozos, so he doesn’t regain his awesome heel status.

    TNA also has the current best heel in the business in Christopher Daniels, but he jobbed to that cowboy while trying to get his feud over with AJ Styles.

    TNA also has Magnus, who should be a major star by now.

    TNA also has Austin Aries, who is awesome.

    Not to mention Kurt Angle, and his oft-hacked twitter account.

    TNA also has the best gimmick going in Joseph Park.

    But, somehow the show sucks… Always.
    Yet, I still watch.

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